Offense Under-Construction// How to Overcome Offense – F.U. – Forgiveness University (Part 2) – Michael Todd – Transformation Church

Mike Todd’s Introduction

• Mike has been gone on sabbatical for almost 8 weeks
• Mike is spiritually constipated and is going to let loose today LOL
• Thank you TC Nation – you’re the best church in the world
• Thank you for continuing to come to church, invite people, give, and allow our message to keep spreading and facilitating people to get saved
• Your faithfulness has allowed us to help people all over the world
• Every year when Mike goes away, he spends 7 days in a hotel to seek God and pray
• God confirmed this series very strongly to Mike
• God is a gentleman, He won’t force his way into your life, He will stand at the door and knock – Let Him in and watch all kinds of amazing things happen

Message Title: F.U.

If we’re honest, that’s how we feel when people offend us, i.e. “F.U”. Some of us say the expletive, and others say regular words with “cussing intensity” – e.g. “forget you!”

Anecdote: One day on a busy family trip, Pastor Mike’s father (The Captain) shouted, “You buncha sorry suckas!” with cussing intensity at Mike and his brothers.

Has anybody had a negative response to something that has offended you?

In 2020, there are a million ways to be offended – racial, political, wearing/not wearing a mask.

Many of us are carrying around so much offense. We want to say F.U., whether it be the expletive or not.

Mike Todd’s Introduction

• The best ability in this season is availability – say, “Lord I’m available”
• We can’t get stronger if we don’t focus on our weakness, which is forgiveness for many of us
• We want to get an understanding of how God wants us to forgive
• The prayer is that by the end of this, maybe you’ll be able to forgive one person and walk in freedom

Message Title: Offense Under-Construction// How to Overcome Offense

Most people would ask why it’s important to forgive.

1. Forgiveness is Fundamental to Our Faith 

A lot of people don’t appreciate fundamentals, i.e. core, or primary rules; principles that everything is based on.

All of the “extra” comes from the fundamentals. A lot of us want to be managers and leaders and have no fundamentals.

When things get difficult, the fundamentals need to be relied on.

2020 has been difficult for many of us because of a lack of fundamentals. You posted a scripture, or got a tattoo of it, but don’t even remember what it said. You lack the fundamentals to apply it.

Prayer, worship, generosity – these are fundamental.

For God so loved the world, he gave.

Many times, pastors are walking in the same level of unforgiveness as the people that they lead. Forgiveness is fundamental to our faith.  

Anecdote: When Mike was young (about 12 years old), he had a natural gift for playing drums. His Dad said that he needed to take lessons. Then when he got to his first lesson, the instructor said that he was really good but he would need to work on fundamentals for the next 6 months. Mike thought it would be fun until he realized that the drums would be taken from him. Mike would need to learn rudiments first. Mike thought he knew them and thought they were easy. Mike was prideful because he had done so much before, but he hadn’t done the fundamentals. Then he made Mike go even faster. He instructed Mike to practice on the pillow because there was no bounce from the drum any more, every stroke needed to be from Mike. When you take it to the bare minimum, what does it look like? If you strip away the likes, your favorite worship song, your small group, what does your walk with God sound like? Does it have endurance, is it even, and does it have the ability to last? Then the instructor switched it up to another fundamental exercise. Mike had to do that for 5 minutes consecutively. Mike had nothing but the pillow and fundamentals for 6 months. Then, he told Mike to play on the drums. Mike didn’t think he could because it had been so long. That’s what many of think when God trains us in a different environment and then gives us an opportunity or tells us somewhere to be. We say things like, “I don’t even know how to do this”. When Mike began to play, it was like the whole drum set was opened up to him in a brand new way and he was able to do stuff he had never done. Then the instructor said, “See, everything that’s fancy, comes from fundamentals”. We have to understand forgiveness because this is a fundamental of our faith. Everything that’s fancy, everything that the world will see, and that people will know you for, will come from fundamentals.

Forgiveness is a fundamental of our faith.

2. Fundamentals Must Be: Practiced – Corrected – Perfected

Fundamentals Are Never Natural. Fundamentals are practiced, they’re corrected, and then they are perfected.

When Mike was on the pillow, it was practiced, corrected by the instructor, and then perfected.

God says we need fundamentals. There are core fundamentals we may be working on for the next three years. In our culture we want everything sped up and want to be overnight sensations. We can’t have everything sped up, even in our faith.

Some of us are allowing our hearts to be affected by unforgiveness that has festered for years.

Offenses are affecting your heart with unforgiveness. You’re okay if you have to walk this act of forgiveness out.

Fundamentals are practiced, corrected, and then perfected.

God is going to have to correct the way that some of us forgive. You write posts “forgiving” people after just talking about them yesterday. Before you make a public post, you may need to make a private promise.

If you stay on this journey of forgiveness, it can become perfected.

Once we learn the fundamentals, we can go to other levels that were kept from us.

If you want to go to a particular level, God needs you to know the fundamentals.

Sometimes our feelings make us forfeit what we really need when God wants us to commit to forgiveness.

If forgiveness is the ending that we want to get to, know that offense is the gateway to unforgiveness.

3. Offense is the Gateway to Unforgiveness

It’s worth repeating because it creates a prison for you. You end up in a space and a place you never imagined being in. Offense is either ‘picked up’ or ‘put on’. Why is it so hard to forgive though?

The Holy Spirit told Mike that:

4. Offense is the Currency of Our Culture, but Forgiveness is the Currency of The Kingdom

We buy offense.

People in culture sell offense. We’re the ones that click on the things that shouldn’t be watched. We cause the culture to constantly give us a little more because of the views and the subsequent profit.

The currency of the kingdom of God is forgiveness.

John 18:36 New Living Translation (NLT)

36 Jesus answered, “My Kingdom is not an earthly kingdom. If it were, my followers would fight to keep me from being handed over to the Jewish leaders. But my Kingdom is not of this world.”

In other words, if they responded like the culture, there would be riots in the street. The response isn’t the same because we don’t belong to your kingdom.

We tend to want heavenly rewards with earthly responses. That’s not how it works.

No matter what we deal with internally, we still have an enemy. The enemy’s agenda is destruction (John 10:10). He wants to destroy our families, purpose, hope, etc. His strategy is division.

Agenda ————– Destruction

Strategy ————- Division

We never saw the devil until it was both Adam and Eve in the garden. The moment unity came into the picture, he began to divide. That’s why he attacks your marriage. That’s why he divides the church by making them democrats and republicans, black church and white church, Hispanic church, and Asian church, a husband who loves video games more than his wife, a wife who loves her children more than her husband. If you’re breathing and you’re God’s creation, you’re called to be a part of this even if we don’t like the same music, politics, or food, God said we are family and if we fight for unity, then we defeat the strategy of the enemy.

The enemy also has a tactic. “What do I do with every action to throw them off of their game?”

The enemy’s tactic is offense.

Tactic ————— Offense

Matthew 24:10-12 King James Version (KJV)

10 And then shall many be offended, and shall betray one another, and shall hate one another.

11 And many false prophets shall rise, and shall deceive many.

12 And because iniquity shall abound, the love of many shall wax cold.

If your platform is not centered on the word of God, you can be in offense thinking you’re right and you’re wrong.

The constant faith being built in the wrong thing leads to deception.

When you start taking pieces without the principles – iniquity shall abound. Offense ends up in the love of many waxing cold.

When your heart grows cold, you stop caring about everyone. For many people, there’s an ‘ice box where your heart used to be’ because you let offense turn into deception, made you listen to false prophets, get hate in your heart, and now your heart is cold.

John 13:35 New International Version (NIV)

35 By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another.”

The enemy’s plan is for you to have a hard heart and to no longer know love. The enemy is pleased when you don’t care about others and have a cold heart. He’s pleased when he gets you fighting, distracted, and falling for the offense.

Offense starts very, very small. It can be as simple as forgetting your birthday. “You’ve known me too long” or “you know how much my birthday means to me”.

On the other hand, some of us are offended in our marriage because of how we talked to each other. We learn to live with the offense and have good and bad days.

Then other things happen at work and you hear little racist things and have to deal with microaggressions.

Then, when you’re offended by something else, your offense doesn’t take into consideration, your authority or platform. Then you bring your ‘whole self’ and want to put Black Lives Matter right outside the church. You begin to build a barrier to your purpose.

Many people are walking in pain or frustration because offense was put on them. “Everyone in my family keeps leaving me out”, etc.

You had offenses you picked up, but then offenses were put on. You were molested when you went to your cousin’s house when you only wanted to watch cartoons. Now it feels like the walls are closing in on you.

Then you end up sleeping with your friend in Vegas and the woman who you thought was supposed to marry you is offended. Then ironically, that person having an issue with the offense that you committed against them, offends you.  

Know that false prophets come through music too. Your false prophets can be music or images that align with your offense. You hear what you want to hear when you want your faith to grow in that instead of in the word of God.

Then, you put on more offense.

You even make other churches “pay” for what the last church did to you by not recognizing your talents etc. “They’ll need to prove to me why I should be here,” “my purpose was praise and worship but they didn’t give me a chance.”  

5. Offense Builds the Prison of Unforgiveness 

God can see you like this:

The year 2020 has been offensive – people have been dying, jobs have been lost, movements have had to form, there has been racism, political matters, etc.

2020 has barb wire around it. Note that it may not be 2020 for you – it could anything for you. The situations in your life have only left a little space for God to use you.

Everything else has kept you trapped in the prison of unforgiveness.

Furthermore, there are offenses that we work hard to keep. Even when it drops, we choose to pick it up and leave it around us – “I’m not letting that go”, “I’ll never forget what they did.”

The space for you to be used by God gets smaller and smaller.

He can’t even take you into a white board room because your offense will keep you from your purpose in there when you see that everyone is white.

You have to recognize that you can’t Netflix and chill with everybody. Was it worth another board and being further out of destiny and purpose?

The church looks like Wilson from Home Improvement when trying to do the will of God but trapped in the prison of unforgiveness.

Then, God sends someone into your life to mentor. You want to mentor them but the last person you mentored was a bad experience and you can’t forgive that person.

Then because of your prison, you’re hoping you can be close to the new mentee from within the prison because you can’t let go of the offense of someone who isn’t even that person.

Then God sends a man into your life to be a father figure due to you not having a dad in your life growing up.

The problem is that they can only get a piece of you. They can even get cut sometimes, or receive harsh treatment from you, because your prison of unforgiveness has you lethal.

“Apologies for the barb wire and caution tape; hopefully, we can have a pure relationship.”

Then you realize that we need an interracial church – you pray for diversity and are about to interview a qualified white candidate that God sent – then George Floyd happens.

What happens when God sends the right thing and your offense prevents you from seeing it that way?

The very walls you put up to defend yourself can end up harming you. What served you in one season can damage you in another. The offense you hold onto in terms of your family members can become the prison that hinders your purpose.

The prayer today is that we will no longer be trapped in the prison of offense. Piece by piece, you will start tearing out the offense and forgive your dad, your coworker, and any others who have offended you.

There’s grace for you.

Your offenses no longer need to imprison you.

We have to lay down and cast down our offenses.

The problem is that after today, you can go right back into the prison and start picking up more offenses. Even if they all go away, one post, one lie, or one misunderstanding can cause you to pick up another offense. This is why forgiveness is a fundamental of the faith.

Today, God needed us to see that the prison of offense has to be managed. You have to ask the Holy Spirit to manage your offenses so they don’t keep you trapped in places God never wanted you to be in.

Proverbs 18:19 English Standard Version (ESV)

19 A brother offended is more unyielding than a strong city,

    and quarreling is like the bars of a castle.

When you get offense between the people that you’re supposed to love, it becomes fortified – it’s an unyielding prison – more unyielding than a strong city.

That’s why we see that people talk about forgiveness at the caskets and burials of people when it’s already too late.

Walk in forgiveness — It’s for you (the trapped person), not the person you forgive (the person outside the prison).

Could you make a decision to put your fence under construction?

“My offense is under construction. I’m pulling up stuff and laying it down.”

Can you pull up stuff and lay it down?

2,000 years ago, a man took all of our sins. God took all of the offense of humanity and put it on Jesus.

The offense of racism, political lies, family members – and had Jesus die on the same tree that makes fences – every offense you can build, He died on the same thing so that you could walk free from offense. We’ve all sinned and fall short of the glory of God. He’s asking you to drop the offense the same way He did it for you.

It’s hard. It will hurt for a long time. It’s incomprehensible, but through the power of the Holy Spirit and God’s word, we will figure out how to let go of offenses and walk in forgiveness.  

Offense Builds the Prison of Unforgiveness

Thousands of people are trying to move around in a contraption like this. We have to go back to the fundamentals and we have to get in the word of God.

When Jesus said to forgive 70 times seven, it was about losing count, not about keeping score.

He wants you to get in such a fundamental habit that you would go back to forgiveness no matter what the pressure, situation, or person looks like. Since you experienced it, you’ll give it away.

 Proverbs 19:11 English Standard Version (ESV)

11 Good sense makes one slow to anger,

    and it is his glory to overlook an offense.

You’re walking in glory when you let an offense go.

We ask Him to show us His glory, but He’s asking us the same thing.

Let go of offense. Put it under construction.

Offense is always changed from the inside out.

6. Forgiveness is Always from the Inside Out 

When you start laying down offenses, there will be room to roam.

Community can also help you get them out of your life. Community can allow you to confess the offenses and get in a space where you can really say, “If you can use anything Lord, anything you want to do, I’m available.”

You will walk in your purpose and the prison of offense will no longer keep you in.

Say Lord, “I’m available”, or “I want to be available to you.” Start with the desire.

Somebody needs to make this your prayer.

Prayer and altar call: If you know you’re in a prison of offense, whether it’s for people near, far, or that you haven’t seen for decades, and you want God to start that thing in your heart right now, pray that God will begin a deep work in your heart. I declare and believe that you are giving us the ability to lay down offenses. Today, we’re asking by your Holy Spirit that you will tear down the walls we picked up and the ones we put on us. God, I’m asking that you give us the desire to forgive. Today, that seed was planted. We’re serving notice on the enemy that you will not be able to steal this seed. There will be fruit. There’s people listening right now who has never received forgiveness and have never given their life to Christ. Today, you have the opportunity to make the greatest decision of your life – give your life fully to Jesus Christ. God has taken and paid the debts for and released you of everything you’ve done – all you have to do is receive it. This decision for Mike took him from being a manipulator, liar, and addicted to pornography. No matter what you’re doing or have done, if you give Him your heart, he’ll help you change your habits. He wants to give you the gift of salvation. All you have to do is confess with your mouth and believe in your heart. Then you can walk out your earthy life with Jesus as both savior and Lord.

Let’s Pray Together: Lord, today, I give you everything. My offenses, my hurt, and my pain, you can have it all. I believe that you lived and you died, just for me. Today, I give you my whole life. Change me, renew me, transform me, I’m yours, in Jesus name, Amen.

If you just prayed that prayer, know that in heaven, this room, and all around the world, we’re turning up for you (rejoicing).

• Text ‘Saved’ to 918-992-7623 for resources and content to help you lay down offenses

You can still get “Relationship Goals” the book and study guide today for additional relationship support:

Latest Arrivals in Merch

SUMMARY NOTES

1. Forgiveness is Fundamental to Our Faith
2. Fundamentals Must Be: Practiced – Corrected – Perfected
3. Offense is the Gateway to Unforgiveness
4. Offense is the Currency of Our Culture, but Forgiveness is the Currency of The Kingdom
5. Offense Builds the Prison of Unforgiveness
6. Forgiveness is Always from the Inside Out

Link to full Video: Here

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